A theatre person will pack his schedule to the very limit. The theatre day starts at 10:00am and ends at roughly 1:00am. During that time a typical theatre person will have at least 20 things to do and that includes rehearsal for at least two plays. If you find a theatre person with a free hour during the day, it’s probably because they haven’t found any way to use that hour on some kind of show or errand.
The whole point of this packed schedule is so that they can complain to their friends about how busy they are. If you don’t believe me, just find a theatre person a week after the show opens and they no longer have rehearsals, or shop hours or vocal appointments. They will be miserably bored and then they will complain about how there’s nothing to do.
In order to gain favor with the theatre person, you must give them the opportunity to complain. There are a couple of questions that you can ask to open up this can of worms:
1. How’s the show going? –This simple question will give them the chance to bitch about their co-stars, the director, the stage manager, the costumes, or anything else pertaining to the show.
2. Do you wanna have lunch? –This will give them the chance to say, “I really shouldn’t, I have so much that I need to get done. I guess I can take a half hour out to get a bite to eat.” After which they will go to a restaurant and spend two hours with you complaining about all of the stuff they should be doing.
3. How do you stay sane? — This is one of the greatest, because it includes the element of admiration that theatre people are so fond of. It lets them know that you already recognize how amazing they are to deal with the hectic schedule they’ve created for themselves, and it lets them basque in your praise. If you compliment them on how well they can do everything they complain about you’re golden.
Under no circumstances should you ever say, “Maybe you should cut back on some of your obligations.” That translates directly to “It’s your own fault that you have so much to do. Blame yourself.”
Nobody wants to hear that.
